Monday, March 26, 2007

Of being dull and scared

I feel detached today. Like I don’t really care about anything or anyone. It’s like watching the whole world go around me like some live drama or a fucking 360 degree plasma tv. Like I was watching them all play their parts, do what they do and still, I stand and watch. It’s a crazy idea, but what if I am a part of it all too, that I’m another mannequin, but suddenly I get - life?

What should I be feeling? Unbelonging?

Not quite I guess. I was scared. Scared as hell.

Whatever intelligent being is doing the work of the mannequin-controlling somewhere where I don’t really care, isn’t it part of His big huge plan? Could He just PLAY around with me like a bauble and discard me when done? And how many like me has He seen till now? What leads me to believe in this, I don’t know. But somehow, I want to believe.

1 comment:

TMaYaD said...

what the hell is that all about?